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09 February 2011 @ 02:01 am
How do people do this?

Ive never had a problem like this. Ive never had something that hurt so bad emotionally that it hurt physically that didn't come from someone dying or going to jail. I've never had anything hurt this way.
I always had a sort of aversion to relationships. Even in the beginning with Mark, I was so hesitant...he wanted to be a "couple" long before I did. Because it means opening yourself up and I don't like to do that with people I can't necessarily count on. Statistically, you're less likely to lose friends and family then you are significant others, and I didn't see the point in putting in the effort on someone who could disappear overnight.
But I did. Because I love him. Because part of me always loved him.
And the past two months have been hard...but I thought it was almost over. I thought he would be home soon. I felt it.
And now...now it's not going to happen.
He can't come home...his plans fell thru. The only hope is that he finds a job, saves up enough money to get a place to stay here, and then comes home and finds another job here. He wants me to come see him, and it kills me that I can't. Absolutely kills me.
And what am I supposed to do? He asked if this was too hard...and what difference does it make? Breaking up wouldn't change anything...he's not here as it is. And all I would do is miss him and want to be with him, which is exactly where I am right now.
I wish it wasn't 1am. I wish I could go to Sahar's and have her make me a cup of tea. I wish I could cry to my mom.
This sucks.
I don't like this. Not at all.
Feeling: depresseddepressed
30 January 2011 @ 09:22 pm
Since I've been recording the amusing things my friends say for several years, I like to post them at the end of the year in my blog.
I dont write them down as much anymore, but what I do write down, I usually find particularly funny.
Here's 2010:

Tom Lillis: so we’re going to go there, and you may or may not see him...and that's the entire plan? :P
Mysticmoon13 : that what I’ve got so far.

Tom: So the plan now is for me to stand here and drink a beer next to you.
Me: Yes.
Tom: Do you know what the definition of “plan” is?

Drew: B-money gonna stab a bitch.

Me: I’m not sad or unhappy, that’s just my face!!
Tom: Your autobiography: That’s Just My Face, the [my name here*] story.
*Had to omit name. It appears on search engines, and I dont particularly want future employers reading about what songs I like, people that piss me off, and how I miss my boyfriend.

Katy: So since she’s a dude now, I don’t think it counts.
Me, Rick, Tom: It counts.

Katy: I want some cake.
::Waiter appears with a silver platter of cakes::
Waiter: Cake?
Me: Only to you. This would happen only to you.

Me: Did you pick this Police song on the jukebox?
Katy: No, I picked something else you’ll appreciate.
Tom: OOH! Please let it be “Don’t Stand So Close to Me!”

John: My ears just heard you say that you were going to go make a whore out of that swan.

Me: What would Michael York do?

Peter: C’mon people! I’m missing ice dancing for this!!

Me: New rule, you are no longer allowed to sing Lady Gaga in rehearsals.
Drew: Awww…

Me: It smells like roses.
John: Because I just farted.

Me: You have a pirate notebook.
Matt: Yours says “Urp.”
Me: Well, Chris got it for me…
Matt: Yeah, mine too.

Me: Before I lock up, does everyone have their valuables?
Drew: Wait…ok, I’ve got my C3PO pez dispenser.

Mark: wht were we chattin bout?
Me: i said i smoked, and you asked me to marry you. then I laughed a lot.

Drew: Thanks, B-Money.
Me: I need a nickname for you. I start with “D”…but then all I think of is “bag.”

Conversation with my THEN ex boyfriend, who, on our second date, didn’t have enough money to take me to the art gallery.
Me: lol well lets just see how famous you get haha
Mark: wow way to check a mutha fucking bank account lol
Me: lmao well you know, a girl likes to be taken to the art gallery now and then...
Mark: wow
Mark: wow
Mark: nice

Me: What are you guys growing?
Marleen: Beans.
Wendy: Pot.

Mark: Hey I ain’t been trying to hit that in a minute.
Me: Like, literally a minute. You JUST asked me out.

Joe: I got my pimp clothes on.

Josh: Is your mom drunk?
Me: I think so.
Josh: Awesome! That’s when I like hanging out with her best!

Me: I just read that sign that said “Maintenance Vehicles Only” and I wanted to tell it that “YOU’RE a maintenance vehicle” but then I thought it was taking it all a little too far.

Mysticmoon13: whatever floats your boat.
Tom Lillis: I will consult with my boat on the floating situation and get back to you. :P

Me: And then he asked why I was being such a bitch.
Mark: Ohhhhh no. Nobody calls Brigid a bitch. You just don’t do that.

Mark: I got good at knowing when to get a girl pregnant, can’t u tell?
Me: Yeah, you’re a pro.

Mysticmoon13: well it is the only place i can get an irish banger. so thats a plus.
Jaime Stachowiak: I don't even want to know what an irish banger is
Mysticmoon13: its a sausage lol
Jaime Stachowiak: That doesn't make it sound less dirty

Drew: We have this thing, where I call her B-Money and she calls me D-Bag. Of course, as per your sexual harassment clause, no one else may call me D-Bag.

Jake: I could paint a mustache on my finger and hold it under my nose.
Lisa: But you already HAVE a mustache.

Me: Maybe you have Ando’s power, but for friendship…
Jaime: Yes, I am the obnoxiousator…

Mary: One plus two does not equal Megan!!

Jeff: Brigid, stop distracting me with your disgustingness.
Drew: Oh my god, I can’t believe you just said that.

(While cast discusses new undergarment discovery, the C-String.)
Me: I’m glad to see everyone has completely disregarded the sexual harassment clause.

Sahar: You should write an autobiography.
Me: I can never think of things when I write. It's not like when I talk to you and have 1500 stories about Kevin.
Sahar: And there's the title.

Mom: Well, it isn’t her fault that we’re not invited to her wedding.
Me: Um….that totally sounds like her fault.

Gram: There’s some snow on that chair.
Peg: Fake snow?
Gram: No, on the chair, I put it there yesterday.
Peg: Well…it melted.

Mel: What was wrong with the doll on the island of misfit toys?
Tim: Oh, she cuts herself.

Jaime: Couple gifts? What are we going to do, get them a gift card to Pier 1? Steve doesn’t even know what that is!!

Jaime: That model looks like a popple! Oh my god, I had that popple! It turned into a soccer ball!

Me: Oh, you could just powerhouse that…
Steve: Yeah.
Me: What is it about a U-Haul that gets me talking like Todd?

Me: It does kind of look like the town from Derry…holy crap, is that Beverly Marsh’s house?!
Feeling: boredbored
23 January 2011 @ 01:14 am
Just in case you were wondering, I hate this. I absolutely hate this.

I keep wishing for some kind of miracle. Some sort of magic pot of gold leprechaun luck. Something, anything.

I’m doing real well keeping my cool; I’m doing real well going through the motions, keeping the smile on my face, letting it be what it is.

But I hate this. I hate this more than I’ve ever hated anything.

I just want him to come home.

...That's about all I can let myself express at the moment. Maybe more later.
Feeling: lonelylonely
Hearing: everything-alanis
I haven't updated here in some time, but I got the new Goos album for Christmas. And there's really no better place to post my favorite lyrics from it. After all, Ive done it so many times before.

You know I run to find the answers
What I need to find is you
And I don't need anything
No, I don't need anything
Because I know you always take me as I am
You know you get me through the darkness
You know you get me through the day
~As I Am

It's 3 A.M and I can't sleep without you
I think I've found the perfect words to say
The shattered light tansmits my voice
Sometimes we don't have a choice
I'd wake you up from half a world away

We've got one night to let the whole world know,
forget about the falling stars, tonight we'll show them who we are
Your life' s a song I sing
and it doesn't matter anymore
if anyone is listening to me
~One Night

Someday, I'm gonna get this right
Gonna find a better way, I wanna lead another life
I wanted to let you know me,
but I'm trapped inside the fear
and I never said a word though you always seemed to hear
When I take so long to say these words,
yeah, you wait so long for me
~Nothing is Real

Don't make a sound we stayed away from all the static on the line
I guess we never stopped to shine
I'd cry out loud if I remembered all the mess I'd left behind
But then I'd have to lie
~Now I Hear

And I never thought I'd see
you living on your knees
A slave to some disease
that holds you captive
And you can look inside of me
but the answers that you seek
and everything you need
is all inside you
I know things change, your world has slipped away
I know things change, but you're living like a soldier
who's caught in the fray
Don't lose your faith, it's not so cold, it's not too late

This is a completely irrelevant thought...at least it is to anyone who reads this. I just find it funny...I've been a Goos fan for so long. They've pretty much written the soundtrack of my life. In fact, there are four people in my life who I have always related their songs to.
And this CD, while not their best or my favorite, just the newest, makes me smile. Because they're still writing songs that remind me of the same four people.
And of course, there's those snippets of lyrics.
And of course, there's those entire fucking songs, as well.

1. Notbroken
All I waited for was a chance to make you understand
and tell you these forgotten truths you never thought were real
And if the world should turn it's back, you know that I'm still here

Time won't ever steal my soul
We're not broken, so please come home

Morning comes, and life moves on
and when it changed, you didn't know where you belong
And I'll still catch you when you fall
through a past that steals your sleep
and scrawl these words upon your wall, remind you to believe

Time won't ever steal my soul
We're not broken, so please come home
If the world has worn you down
I'll be waiting, so please come home

I won't let them break you down
and I won't hear the empty sounds,
I'm hopelessly pretending that I know the answer
Angels like neon fires that burn so cold through your desires
And all you are is all I need to know

When the world is insane,
you get used to the pain
and you don't even know what you feel
And I was like you,
all alone and confused
but you know it's not forever

Time won't ever steal my soul
We're not broken, so please come home
If the world has worn you down
I'll be waiting, so please come home

2.Still Your Song
Called you up ten years too late
Just to hear your voice again
I know your voice is still the same
I know that something's changed

My words are choked and full of tears
But still you listen to me dear
And someone's calling you away
And now I understand

The time that I've wasted
So bitter and faithless
Is wearing me down now
Down now

So can you hear me
Or would you sing along
Or turn me down
Forget I ever wrote this for you
So can you hear me
Or has it been too long
I know that I was wrong
And this is still your song

Turn it on and off again
And now I lost another friend
You waded through my darkest thoughts
When I was sure to drown

And now I pass you on my way
And if you stop, what could I say
Apologies for yesterday
Like a fool, I walk away

The time that I've wasted
So bitter and faithless
Is wearing me down now
Down now

So can you hear me
Or would you sing along
Or turn me down
Forget I ever wrote this for you
So can you hear me
Or has it been too long
I know that I was wrong
And this is still your song

And all I understand
We're here and gone again
Even through a thousand sleepless nights

I fill the page with my beliefs
It's all I have to keep
Tear it up and start again

So can you hear me
Or would you sing along
Or turn me down
Forget I ever wrote this for you
So can you hear me
Or has it been too long
I know that I was wrong
And this is still your song

I don't pretend to understand all the things I put you through
And I don't need forgiveness
But I owe one thing to you
This is your song
This is your song

3. Something For the Rest of Us
I was a stranger, and you came to my side
and you said 'oh, you're alright now'
And you were so knowing,
I felt so lost and confused

Oh, I need you there
when the nightmares and dreams have come true

I barely knew you, but you talked til' you laughed
til' you cried out so loud 'someone save me'
Oh, black streaks of Maybelline run down your cheeks again
I prayed for answers, you take the chances or refuse

Oh, I need you there
when the nightmares and dreams have come true
Oh, I need you there
when the nightmares and dreams have come true

Yeah, we belong
Yeah, we belong
Yeah, we belong
Yeah, we belong

Oh, I need you there
when the nightmares and dreams have come true

4. Hey Ya
if i could give you
all the things you've been denied
would it change you
would you feel alive
all that's left now
are these words that i've been trying to say to you now
and together we'll get by somehow
and all you ever wanted was for someone to find
the truth you hide from everyone deep inside

hey ya hey ya
you're the only one i want
hey ya hey ya

and i was trying to save you from
the sickened parts you feel
and i love you just the same
so don't you ever feel ashamed
because we all get tired of fighting
just to feel like we belong
and i know you feel forgotten
but i've been here all along to say
and all you ever wanted was someone to find
the truth you hide from everyone deep inside

hey ya hey ya
you're the only one i want
hey ya hey ya

and you hide yourself so deep inside
will i ever see, ever see you
now i'm the one who's been denied
but i believe in you, believe in you

hey ya hey ya
and you're the only one i want
hey ya hey ya
you're the only one i want
hey ya hey ya

you're the only one i want
Feeling: lovedloved
Hearing: goos
27 September 2010 @ 11:41 am
I'm hesitant to write about Mark, perhaps because I don't want to pop the bubble I sometimes feel we live inside. And yet, I need to express things, and don't know any way better than writing.

Last night, I slept in a pair of jeans.
I brushed my teeth without thinking about it.
And I realized I hadn't plucked my eyebrows in two days.

I used to pluck them daily. I used to abhor the thought of sleeping in jeans. I used to have a whole routine laid out for teeth brushing.

Now, I have OCD, and I'm medicated and in therapy, and it's significantly better than it used to be in that it no longer consumes my life. There were some remaining quirks, which I call "my crazies," and I have lived with them so long that I don't really notice anymore.
But today I noticed that those quirks are fading a little...
He lessens my crazy.

I'm sure that all people think they're relationship is more special than other peoples, and you can accuse me of thinking the same. We seem to fit together in a way that I really didn't expect, but at the same time doesn't surprise me. Maybe because we dated before, but I didn't know him then the way I know him now. When we were together before it was all happy-honeymoon-period and then when things got complicated we both freaked out. And we had the honeymoon period and its pretty much passed, but it hasn't caused a freak out, and hasn't changed anything really. We had our first fight, and it was a big one, but we worked it out, which is something we never would have done 7 years ago. I feel like Chandler and Monica in that episode of Friends where they realize they're in an adult relationship, lol. I know things are not going to be easy...but it doesn't matter, because I'm happy, and I know I'm strong enough now.

That's all for now. Just getting some things out of my head.
Feeling: geekygeeky
Hearing: tuesday in amsterdam-counting crows
27 August 2010 @ 11:41 pm
"how can I go home
with nothing to say
I know you're going to look at me that way
and say what did you do out there
and what did you decide
you said you needed time
and you had time

you are a china shop
and I am a bull
you are really good food
and I am full
I guess everything is timing
I guess everything's been said
so I am coming home with an empty head

you'll say did they love you or what
I'll say they love what I do
the only one who really loves me is you
and you'll say girl did you kick some butt
and I'll say I don't really remember
but my fingers are sore
and my voice is too

you'll say it's really good to see you
you'll say I missed you horribly
you'll say let me carry that
give that to me
and you will take the heavy stuff
and you will drive the car
and I'll look out the window making jokes
about the way things are

how can I go home
with nothing to say
I know you're going to look at me that way
and say what did you do out there
and what did you decide
you said you needed time
and you had time"
Feeling: contemplativecontemplative
Hearing: you had time- ani difranco
14 August 2010 @ 01:24 am
A year ago, I got my drivers license.
I have been happy ever since.

One full year of being happy. Sure, there have been bumps, and things that made me sad at times, but overall, it’s just been happiness.
My mother tells me that she’s proud of me all the time. Almost daily, at least weekly. And perhaps pride is a deadly sin, but damnit, I’m proud of me, too. I got my license, and got over my fear of driving. I got a job at a place that isn’t perfect but is perfect for me. I had a fantastic award winning theater season, which earned me the title I’ve wanted since I was sixteen. I realized a lot of things…who matters and who doesn’t, how to handle things, how to get over things. I came to terms with something that has plagued me since I was a teenager, and stopped making apologies for things I did not do. I saved my money and bought a car. I strengthened friendships that needed it, and let go of ones that were toxic. I learned to appreciate my sister, and the rest of my family. I learned that love has nothing to do with what someone can give you, but what you can create in each other, together.

Sure, there are other things I want. There are other things I still need to do. But once upon a time, I was so broken, and now I don’t feel that way anymore. In fact, I hardly remember what it feels like.
And I am so so so so so grateful that I can say that.
Feeling: happyhappy
Hearing: shes only happy in the sun-ben harper
So. Unexpected complication in my life. Well, not really a complication. Though many would see it as such.
I know what the opinions here are, and I am ok with that. My mother, being my mother, has had a freakout of epic proportions over this, even though she’s trying to act like she isn’t. But the fact that she called me on her break yesterday instead of waiting another hour and a half until she got home proves to me that she is freaking.

I went out with Mark Saturday night.

It was nice. It was very nice. We drove around for a bit looking for something to do and then we ended up back near his house and he showed me this path up near a reservoir. It was a very peaceful little place considering that we were in the middle of Lovejoy. We talked a lot, and that was good. I’d forgotten a lot about our relationship…some because I chose not to remember, and some because it was actually a really bad point in my life. But really, it wasn’t bad because of him. Even at the end…I was pissed. I was hurt and disappointed. But it could have been so much worse…I got over things relatively quickly. In the end, I was sad because we had been such good friends, and that was over, more than I was sad that we weren’t dating anymore.
Since then, things have changed a lot for both of us. His situation has, in ways, improved. Also, arguably, gotten worse…he’s got a bunch of kids now. Fortunately, they’re all with the same woman. (This is, however, my mother’s greatest issue with all this.) If I were looking at this in a relationshippy way, I really do not care. They aren’t my kids. Lots of guys I have met have children…it’s not like I’m nineteen anymore. It’s not as big an issue for me as it is for my mother, or as it would have been for me a few years back.
Other than that, there aren’t too many issues anymore. All the things that were a big freaking deal back when we were together really don’t matter anymore.
I know that mom worries. I know that my friends worry…Molly and Sahar told me as much, and while Jaime hasn’t flat out said it, I’m sure she agrees. I appreciate their concern.
Although, sometimes, I have trouble understanding it. The only serious relationship I had was with Mark. And no one really knows what I’m like in a relationship, except Mark. Yes, I have liked guys before, loved some, even, and had my heart broken…but no one worries when I say I have a crush on someone new. Mark didn’t break my heart…it wasn’t his to break, really…but everyone worries about this.
No, he hasn’t made the best choices, but neither have I. I wouldn’t want someone to hold my behavior from 6 years ago against me, so why should I hold it against him? If this was the case, and people still bore grudges from that time in my life, I wouldn’t be speaking to Liz or Katy. Fortunately, that is not the case. Fortunately, they forgave me for my complete idiocy. I think that people overlook this sort of thing with time, if they really love and care for someone…it’s like “Yeah, so and so was an asshat…but they’re still so and so and I love them.” It’s all a matter of what you can forgive and what you can accept. I can accept the things Mark has done, and I think I can forgive the things he has done to me…though to be honest, I haven’t totally tried that yet. But I’m willing to.

This is all moot, anyway. I have no intention at the moment of jumping into a serious relationship with him. I like hanging out, I like seeing him, and yes, there is still some spark left. But here’s what I don’t want: I don’t want baby mama drama. I don’t want to inherit a bunch of kids overnight. I don’t want things to go too fast. I don’t want to put other things in my life on hold for him (or anyone, for that matter.)
I would like to date him. I would not like to call him my boyfriend. At least, not yet.
I don’t want to be the girl who goes back to the shitty ex because there isn’t anything else on the horizon, but I also don’t want to be the girl who doesn’t understand that circumstances change and doesn’t take the risk to see if there’s something left.
It’s a tricky situation.

Things are going really well for me right now. I know mom doesn’t want that to get messed up. But I don’t know that this would mess it up. I actually don’t think it would. I read an article saying that the difference between men and women is that men can compartmentalize their life…there’s work, there’s family, there’s friends, there’s girls…they don’t all blend together into a big ol’ mess. But I’ve always been that way. When I’m at the day care, I’m at the day care, not the theater. When I’m at the theater, I’m at the theater, not home. When I’m with my friends, I’m focused on my friends (though we talk about the other things,) and when I’m with Mark…I’m with Mark.
Though, for the record, I was always the dude in our relationship. He was the one telling me he loved me, and I was the one shying away from it.
My point being that whatever does or does not happen with Mark has no bearing on anything else in my life. Maybe someday it will…maybe if we do end up together and out lives become intertwined, then yes. But right now…that’s not the case.

I don’t know how I’m feeling about all this, really. I’m just sort of playing it by ear. And so far I have no worries, and no regrets.
Feeling: thoughtfulthoughtful
Hearing: i wont be left-tegan and sara
I haven’t written in a long time. The reasons why range from the mundane (work work and more work) to more personal reasons (haven’t been able to find words for certain emotions.) But at the moment, I’m a little pissed off.
There is a small part of me that says to be quiet, to let it go, it doesn’t change anything, it’s not important. But the bigger, louder, stronger part of me knows that even though it may seem silly to others, it’s really annoying me, and really is unfair.
If anyone else came up to me pissed off because someone wouldn’t friend them on Facebook, then I would think they were a whiner.
Well, I don’t care if I’m a whiner.
This isn’t some random chick from SHA.
This isn’t an ex boyfriend, or a theater person I’ve only met once.
This isn’t even someone I knew from St. Pauls, or someone I used to hang out with once upon a time.
This is my AUNT.
A relative. A member of my family, who has no problem friending 20 other members of my family, but for some reason, won’t friend me.
The first time she denied me, I made the assumption that she was just learning to figure out FB, so maybe she hit ignore instead of accept. The second time, I played it off. I joked that maybe it was because she didn’t recognize my name (she has misspelled it since I was a kid.) But then she friended more and more family members. And I started to wonder…it’s not like she never knew I was on it. It’s not like she didn’t see me plastered all over the walls of her siblings, or my parents, for that matter. Why wouldn’t she want to friend me?
No, this aunt and I are not particularly close. It’s not like Mary, who I consider a friend as much as a relative. But I have another aunt that I’m not particularly close to who accepted my request right away. And whether or not we’re close, I love my family. They’re part of who I am. I may not always agree with everyone or have things in common, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love them. And sure, FB is a stupid way to show someone you love them…there are better ways. But I like it because when someone in my family needs something or has something to say, we’re connected. And I spent a lot of my childhood being disconnected.
When I was a kid we lived on the other side of town, while the rest of my family was in walking distance of each other. Sometimes, we weren’t even informed of birthday parties, let alone random get-togethers. I don’t want to blame that on my parents living in Kenmore, but that’s just how it was.
I remember my cousin Katie, a lot…Cathy and my mom were always cool when we wanted to play together as kids and saw it as a chance to visit. Sue and Duff and Sarah were always around, too. And when I was very young, I was babysat by my Aunt Moe…and also the aunt in question at the moment. But I didn’t live in the neighborhood. As I got older, none of them really got to know me…at least not anything past what my parents would tell them. I always got the feeling that my family saw me stuck as that kid they babysat, and never really bothered to see me as anything else. That changed a lot, because Mary started to get to know me. And now I can say that I feel accepted and comfortable around most of my family. Still not all, though, which bothers me even though I can come up with many logical reasons not to care. Still, it’s my family…I love them all, with all their faults. I expect the same in return, and I don’t think it’s much to ask.
I have not done anything to anger my aunt, or make her not want to know me in any way. I don’t believe my parents have either, though if that is the case it should have no bearing on me. She loves my sister, and has always given her plenty of attention. And when I was a kid, it was the same for me. Maybe I haven’t expressed enough affection towards her, but she hasn’t to me, either. Still, I want to be her friend on Facebook, if nothing else. I just cannot fathom any reason for her to deny me that.
Three times.
I have friends on Facebook that I haven’t talked to in years…simply because, if the day comes when I need them or they need me, they can find me.
So why are random people I’ve known for moments in time so willing to keep in touch, but my own flesh and blood can’t hit the accept button? I’ll be honest, it makes me think I did something wrong. It makes me doubt myself, and I absolutely hate that.
Then I think of Barb. This person won’t friend her either, which is ridiculous. I don’t care what your personal bias is, if you friended my mother, Melissa, Kelli, Sue, and Bob (the latter of which is not even related to us) then you should be friending Barb. By the same notion that if you friend Katie, Sarah, Maggie, and Dominic, you should friend me as well.
Maybe it’s just me, but I was raised to appreciate everyone in my family. Maybe you don’t always like them or the things they do, but they are your blood, and they are what make you into you.
My father has said a few times that my family sometimes ignores things instead of dealing with them, and I’ve seen that…seems like sometimes it’s a matter of just waiting to see when the problem fades away. But I don’t like that, and I don’t think it works, because then you bear a grudge and forget why you’re doing it in the first place. I’m vocal about these things…tell me what your problem is so I can either apologize if need be, or tell you what really is going on.
And you know what?
If there is something I did that so heinously offended someone that they can’t even friend me on Facebook, then fuck it. Go ahead, hate me if you must for whatever grudge it is that you hold against me. But don’t look at me like nothings wrong at the next family function…have the guts to hate me in person.
Feeling: irritatedirritated
Hearing: glee soundtrack
16 May 2010 @ 01:27 am
Haven't had much to say.
Or time to say it in, to be more accurate.

My current annoyance (Colin, aka Douchebag) is detailed in my public blog. My current love is sleep, so nothing to discuss there. The job is slightly stressful, but going well. The show is open and running. The "Jail Mail" situation (as Molly refers to it) is fine. Good, even. On 3rd draft of my play. Wrote some new poetry. Hoping to get a car by July. My sister is not too much of a shitshow at the moment. The family in general is well. Same with friends. Same with everything.
So, yeah.
Like I said, not much to say. When there is something to say, usually there's no time to say it in.
Feeling: boredbored